Isaac: "Mom, you know that crazy French general, Napoleon Dynamite?"
Me: (Cough, sputter, choke) Ummmmmmm.....
Isaac: You know the only thing that guy is famous for?!? Being short!
Me: Uh, are you sure?
Isaac: Well, and he was completely insane and tried to take over the planet. Which isn't allowed. They had to arrest him and put him in a jail all by himself on an island with 1000 guards. I think it was Alcatraz.
Me: Hmmm. Where did you learn about this?
Isaac: Everybody knows it. Also, I heard about it when my class was at the pool for swimming lessons. Alex said he couldn't do something because he is too short and Jovann said that Napoleon was short and he practically took over the world so being short is no excuse for anything. Can I have some of your french fries?
I know I should have corrected him but honestly, I didn't know where to begin. I was baffled, so I defaulted to intitiating a goofy-face-making contest across the chips and salsa. Consequently, my child went to bed tonight with the same Captain Bizarro understanding of world history that he woke up with this morning. And I guess it isn't entirely the fault of the overpriced-crunchy-granola education, is it?
No, being short is truly no excuse for not almost taking over the world. That's a good lesson.
ReplyDeleteMaybe Isaac is ready for the nine-year-old's best companion for gee-whiz tidbits, the Guinness (pronounced "genius" if you're nine and have to guess) Book of Bizarro World Records, Kiddie Edition. Surely the crunchy granola school has a copy? Elias's school library does, and he inaccurately acquires all sorts of information from that most engaging of texts.